About 4 years ago, it hit me hard in my spirit that I did not have a relationship with Jesus. I went to church- I had been going to church since I was 6 weeks old. I was saved- I asked Jesus to come into my heart at age 4.
Not that none of that mattered- it would be a long stretch to make that statement. But, I had no real friendship with Jesus. He was my God, He was my Savior, but He was not my friend.
In Acts 17:23, the people were so desperate for a god that they had idols all over the city of Athens- they even built shrines for worship to these so-called gods. Paul tells us that one of the idols had an inscription, "to the god no one knows".
Wow. When I read that, it made my heart break. I thought back to when I was about 30 years old and had lived my whole life up until that point without really knowing the God I served.
I knew about Him, but I didn't know Him for myself. But... I wanted to.
I wanted so much to have a relationship with Jesus. In John 1:1, it says, "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God." The Word was Jesus- He is the Word of God, and He was with God from the very beginning in Genesis 1:1.
This is why I always recommend the book of John to new believers or for those who were like me and already saved but want to know Jesus- it's the New Covenant that we have with God because of Jesus' death and resurrection, and it takes us back to the very beginning where Jesus was and tells us who He is. This is really the first step in developing a deeper relationship with someone- knowing who they are and where they came from.
I was honest with the Lord and simply told Him that I wanted to have a relationship with Him, but I had no desire to read my Bible. This may seem bold, to come to the Creator of the entire cosmos and explain to Him how I didn't want to read any of the words He inspired or said Himself.
Here's the thing- He wants that. He wants our truth. Hebrews 4:16 says, "Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need."
Grace is given to those who need it! Why would grace ever be given to someone who's perfect? Perfect people wouldn't need grace. But, none of us are perfect- therefore, we all need grace. And, how good our God is to be just like a loving Father to tell us to come to Him boldly in our time of need and His arms are outstretched full of love, mercy, and grace.
After I prayed that day, I immediately knew the answer. Sometimes, answers from the Lord come quickly and sometimes, they don't. But that day, I knew exactly what I needed to do to begin my friendship with Jesus: open His Word every single day.
The next day, I opened my Bible, read for awhile, felt nothing (except maybe a little dread) and closed it. The day after that, I opened my Bible, read for awhile, felt nothing, and closed it. The next day, same thing.
I can't tell you how many days this went on, but what I can tell you is that over a period of time of consistently opening my Bible and reading, I began to crave it.
Ever since then, I have absolutely loved reading my Bible, getting to know the Father for who He really is, seeing how He operates, getting to know Jesus and studying His earthly ministry, and how compassionate and merciful He was with people, and so much more.
The Bible is the very best book we could ever read. I would not have said that 4 or 5 years ago.
My hope in sharing my story with getting to know God through His Word is that you will also begin to develop your relationship with Jesus. We don't need to read books about Him more than we read the very book that was inspired by Him.
Books are amazing, and there is nothing wrong with reading books from authors who are gifted by the Lord to string words into thought-provoking, beautiful sentences, but no book could ever replace the Bible.
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