I don't look at myself or life the same way anymore.
There are moments and events in our lives that are defining. Not every day or even every year will hold these experiences, but they will surely come.
I had three of them happen last year that all caused me to go to a different vantage point in my life.
I haven't lost my faith- in fact, it grew in the midst of the trials. God created us in such a way that we have the ability to choose how we react in any given situation. It's often the reaction that determines the outcome.
I once heard someone say as believers in Jesus that, "nothing should ever devastate us". It got me thinking about the word, devastate, so I looked it up in the dictionary. Devastate has two meanings- the first, "destroy or ruin something, " and the second, "cause someone severe and overwhelming shock or grief".
In the second meaning, I don't think it's as simple as never being devastated. I experienced grief for the first time in 2022, and at times, it felt like the wave of grief was overwhelming me. I pursued the comfort of the Holy Spirit to accelerate my healing, and He absolutely did. That doesn't mean I never think of the event and that doesn't mean I never feel sad about it, but that huge aching hole has been filled by the only One who ever could.
The last defining experience I had last year came at the tail-end and caused me to be grateful for the very breath in my lungs. Where I used to spend lots of time thinking about what we'd have for dinner, wanting to order out and nonchalantly eating the food that arrived at my door, I am conscious of the clear breath flowing in and out of my body and happy to simply be alive and well.
God doesn't orchestrate bad things to happen to His people. But, in every single thing we go through, whether good or bad, our character can develop into more of Him. More goodness, more compassion, more patience, more joy, more love.
Jesus is calling His followers to be like Him. We won't be perfect, but we can live this life and learn to use the things we go through, even on a daily basis, for thanksgiving and purpose.
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